Care Givers Blog

Familiy Care Givers Now - Caring for Family

What’s The Worst They Can Say?

OK you guys!  I think I am getting the hang of this "living my best life" thing.  I have spent many of my 51 years on Earth living in fear.  Our parents taught us to have a "healthy fear" of suspected dangers. Look both ways before you cross the street.  Don't touch the stove because it's hot. Hold onto the handrail going down the steps when you are wearing your socks and DON'T RUN!  So, basically before I had developed my language skills, I had developed fears in my life.  Then, limitations were placed on me and I allowed them to anchor and take a firm hold.  Limiting thoughts such as," I can't run faster than the boys.", "Nobody wants to hear what I have to say.", "I'm not good at math." and "I need a boyfriend." became part of my vocabulary and part of who I was sure I was.

For me, it took a long time and a loving God for me to begin to embrace who I really am and what the truth about me really is.  All of the statements above that were perceived  by me to be true are false.  Yes, I don't NEED and boyfriend but I would LIKE to have one at some point. :-)  There is a good life for me and I am beginning to live it.  I create my reality with my thoughts, words and actions.  Just because something may have been true yesterday, does not make it true today (unless it is the word of God).  I am committed to learning and growing and I have been actively for the last 12 years.  And as I apply the things that I have learned, it is becoming more evident that I am more willing to take what I would have considered as risks.  I am more willing to ask bold questions that challenge rather than questions that produce safe, easy answers.  I ask for access and knowledge that leads to access into places that are new for me.  What's the worst anyone can say?  NO.  I think I have heard NO enough to be able to handle it one more time without crumbling into a blubbering pile of worthlessness. 

So when you see me, I may look different and you might think it's my hair or my glasses.  But it's what's under that hair and what's behind those glasses that has changed. Romans 12 verse 2 of the Holy Bible will give you a little more insight.  Fear is not driving my actions or my decision-making.  Love is the motivation behind my actions.  Love for myself and love for those I come in contact with.  And frankly, love for myself may take me out of some social circles.  So, don't hate if we don't see each other as much as we used to.  It's all good.  I may just have to love you from a distance.  But I still have love for you.

All of the small actions I take are beginning to take shape into a bigger and better life.  There is a true transformation at hand.  And the evidence is on the way.  In three years, I am going to look back to 2018 and say, "WOW!  Look at how far I have come!".